Tuesday, February 23, 2010

I believe

This semester I'm taking Ethics&Values, which is basically an advanced philosophy class and so far it has been very difficult academically and spiritually. My testimony has been strenghtened immensley in the last couple months because of that class. My professor was born&raised in Utah as LDS..... now he is athiest. I guess the only way I can understand that he's athiest now is if he never really believed in the first place. But everytime we talk about God, which is almost everyday, it almost brings me to tears. It hurts my heart so much to hear that someone can actually live their life so selfishly to not believe in anything greater than themselves. It hurts my heart so much to not believe that you have a Heavenly Father who knows you, cares about you and loves you more than you could fathom. Everytime he says something negative about God or religion, I just want to stand up and say, "I believe. I KNOW that there is a God. He lives and He loves me and even you when you are choosing not to love Him. He is my light, my life and my Savior. I believe in Him!" I have been more greatful than ever before for my missionaries out serving right now because they are in the field searching for those who have yet to see the light or who choose to turn away from the light. I am so greatful for them and their decisions to dedicate their lives right now to finding His lost children who deserve to have Christ in their lives! I am more greatful now more than ever for the promise I made myself a long time ago to dedicate my life to Him. To make every thought, action, habbit and choice based off of my love for Him. And I'm so greatful for the "re-charges," I get of that decision on a daily basis. I have the incredible opportunity to sing in the Saturday afternoon session of April's General Conference this year (I know, right?!!? Oh, I'll be standing on the very front row, furthest left corner FYI!) and just last week at practice I got another "re-charge," of this covenant I made with Him. One of the songs we're singing is "I Feel My Savior's Love." This song is the most simple and beautiful depiction of what a true testimony should be like. Some of the lines from the song are, "I feel my Savior's in all the world around me, His Spirit warms my sould in everything I see. He knows I will follow Him, give all my life to Him. I feel my Savior's love, the love He freely gives me..... I feel my Savior's love and know that He will bless me. I offer Him my heart, my shepherd He will be. He knows I will follow Him, give all my life to Him. I feel my Savior's love, the love He freely gives me." It moved me to tears as we were singing this because I have sang this song a million times but it's beautiful simplicity has never struck me so profoundly before. I felt re-juvenated and wanting to be better and that fire still has not burned down! Everytime I hear this song now, I get chills and feel that same fire of humility and truth urging me and pushing me to be better! Do more for Him and strive for perfecting myself because that is what He deserves.

I offer Him my heart, My Shepherd He will be. He knows I will follow Him, give all my life to Him.

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